Ah, Midge. Thank heavens you're here. I finally got the photos back from Dorey's wedding! Wasn't it just the bees' knees? I mean, honestly! I had the greatest time. Well, for the most part. No occasion is perfect, you know.
What's that? Why did it take so long to get the pictures?
Because, Midgery...there was a backlog at Blacks. You know, where you get film developed.
What? A camera with no film? Midge, what in heaven's name are you on about? My dear, such a thing simply does not exist! Imagine! Next thing you're going to tell me is that we can instantly send people mail. Oh, Midge. What a fantasy you live in!
But back to the photos!
Here's the first one of hubby and I before we left for the ceremony. David took this, so it's a bit shaky. I'm SO glad the kids were able to join us for the wedding. Even though they're young, it meant everything to them to see Dorey get married.
Here's a picture we took in the car, just as we arrived at the church. You'll notice that the baby has changed outfits. I'll spare you the gory details, but suffice it to say that a good mother always brings at least three sets of everything. And baby wipes. For the love of all that is good and holy.
OK, so this is the start of the ceremony. Look, Midge! There you are, a few rows in front. I can tell it's you because you wore that ghastly hat. Really, dear, why did you make that unfortunate wardrobe decision? I know it matched your dress (unfortunately), but Midge, there are other options. Next time we're both going to a wedding, I'll just take you shopping ahead of time. Or better yet, I'll make your dress!
This is the part where they exchanged rings. Ah, it's so beautiful to see two people in love. Again, pardon the shakiness of the photo. David was fairly insistent about being the photographer. Little dickens always knows what he wants!
Alright, this was the garden. I have to say that at my wedding, the flowers were in full bloom - and seemed so bright. The blossoms were just a little underwhelming. Too bad. Dorey looks lovely, though. I wouldn't have used THAT much blush, but to each her own.
And now a few shots from the reception. Midge, is it just me or does Dorey's new husband look like one of those - oh, what are they? You know - one of those creatures that lives in the water?
No! Not a dolphin. Not a shark. Not a hippo. Not a stingray. No, those large gray things - yes! A manatee. Don't you think he and his family look like a bunch of manatees?
No?
So it's just me then...moving along.
Here's the couple making their grand entrance! Ah, I cried a little. Of course, it WAS funny when the announcer called her "Dairy" instead of "Dorey" - poor dear. That's what you get when you don't pay top dollar for your help.
And here's a picture of the meal. I wanted a snapshot to send to the banquet hall with my letter of complaint- the potatoes were undercooked, the meat was overcooked and the dessert was dreadful. I'm not even sure what it was.
What's that? Trifle?
Well, it should've been more than a trifle better, amiright?
Midge? That was a joke, dear. Generally, a polite lady laughs when another lady makes a joke. I'll just give you a few seconds.
And finally, a picture of the bride and groom cutting the cake. Which, as you know, I baked. It was, I have to say (without any prejudice) the best part of the day.
Whew. Time to put these into my album and stick them on the shelf with the others. Midge, I hope you liked the wedding as much as I did. Oh! And before you go, this is for you.
What is it? It's a packet of doubles, silly. So you can put them in your own album. No need to thank me! It's my pleasure, dear.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Friday, May 6, 2011
LIttle Blessings
My goodness, Midge it has been awhile, hasn't it? Welcome, welcome! Sit down and let me get you some tea. Coffee? Sure. Of course. Why don't I ever remember that?
Where were we? Well, darling, after Dorey's wedding my dear husband decided we ought to get out of town for a few days. He always gets terrible indigestion after spending too much time with my family, so I knew his stomach was probably in a dreadful state. We packed our bags, hopped in the car and drove for three hours. The kids were awfully carsick the whole time, so we had to stop quite often. Really, we could've been there much sooner if they could've managed to keep their lunches down. Ah, but children! They're such a gift. God bless their little hearts.
What's that? Why did we take the children? Oh, Midge - because! We were headed up to the family cottage - and what's better for children than fresh air and sunshine? Nothing! Of course, I don't expect you to know that - since you haven't kids of your own - but dear, when it happens for you (when are you thinking it might happen for you? Are you seeing anyone these days? No? Well, buck up!) you'll know what it really is to feel love.
Yes, Midge - children teach you to love. Before you have them, you have no idea what love is. I daresay anyone who happens to choose NOT to have children clearly doesn't want to let love into their lives. And that makes me so sad.
Our holiday? Well, it was nice enough, thanks for asking. Peter (that's my oldest, you know) caught a nasty cold when we arrived (he went outside and sat on a damp log. That does it every time). Janie (that's my difficult middle child) sprained her ankle pretty badly, so she was laid up for the entire vacation (poor thing!) and the baby was cutting several teeth, so she wasn't very happy about much at all. Really, I didn't get more than two hours sleep each night.
But Midgery, that's what being a mother is all about - sacrifice. Sacrificing your health, your happiness and your very being. Just to keep your children alive. It's the biggest and most important responsiblity you will ever have. Ever. And the hardest job in the universe. I'd love to see a scientist do my job for a day - he would jump out the kitchen window and move to Paris under an assumed name and never call again, praying her children won't look for her. I mean, him.
Ahem.
So that's where we were. Enjoying some family time, cooped up in a cottage with a leaking room for three days of solid rain.
I must say, it is good to be home. And, might I add, it's good to see you again Midge. Do stay for another cup of coffee, won't you?
Where were we? Well, darling, after Dorey's wedding my dear husband decided we ought to get out of town for a few days. He always gets terrible indigestion after spending too much time with my family, so I knew his stomach was probably in a dreadful state. We packed our bags, hopped in the car and drove for three hours. The kids were awfully carsick the whole time, so we had to stop quite often. Really, we could've been there much sooner if they could've managed to keep their lunches down. Ah, but children! They're such a gift. God bless their little hearts.
What's that? Why did we take the children? Oh, Midge - because! We were headed up to the family cottage - and what's better for children than fresh air and sunshine? Nothing! Of course, I don't expect you to know that - since you haven't kids of your own - but dear, when it happens for you (when are you thinking it might happen for you? Are you seeing anyone these days? No? Well, buck up!) you'll know what it really is to feel love.
Yes, Midge - children teach you to love. Before you have them, you have no idea what love is. I daresay anyone who happens to choose NOT to have children clearly doesn't want to let love into their lives. And that makes me so sad.
Our holiday? Well, it was nice enough, thanks for asking. Peter (that's my oldest, you know) caught a nasty cold when we arrived (he went outside and sat on a damp log. That does it every time). Janie (that's my difficult middle child) sprained her ankle pretty badly, so she was laid up for the entire vacation (poor thing!) and the baby was cutting several teeth, so she wasn't very happy about much at all. Really, I didn't get more than two hours sleep each night.
But Midgery, that's what being a mother is all about - sacrifice. Sacrificing your health, your happiness and your very being. Just to keep your children alive. It's the biggest and most important responsiblity you will ever have. Ever. And the hardest job in the universe. I'd love to see a scientist do my job for a day - he would jump out the kitchen window and move to Paris under an assumed name and never call again, praying her children won't look for her. I mean, him.
Ahem.
So that's where we were. Enjoying some family time, cooped up in a cottage with a leaking room for three days of solid rain.
I must say, it is good to be home. And, might I add, it's good to see you again Midge. Do stay for another cup of coffee, won't you?
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